Mooseville USA
  • Welcome Center
  • Arts
    • CHS >
      • MORT'S DOODLE BAR
    • CMT
    • MAC >
      • MAR 2020
    • MAM
    • MPUBCO
    • MOP >
      • Shorts
      • MOPisodes >
        • Real Serious Journalism
        • Try New Things
  • Eats
    • Deer Lizah's
    • Mooseville Café
    • Toots
  • Moose Street
    • Beatnik Books >
      • The Daughter of Swords >
        • Becoming a Warrior
    • Dorky's Videorama
    • Globetrotter Travel
    • Health Nuts
    • Honeydews >
      • Lawn Service
    • Moosecraft
    • Moosemark Card Co
    • Mooseville Marketing
    • Moose Tracks
    • Shoe Fly
    • Sweet Moose Tees
    • The Dojo >
      • Self Defense
    • Vinyl >
      • Harmonica Lessons
    • Better Business Bureau
    • XXX
  • News
    • MJR >
      • Sports
      • The Funnies
    • MNN
    • MPR >
      • TMYS Subs
    • MWS
  • Trolley
  • UNI
    • Book Store
  • Gov
    • MAYOR'S OFFICE
    • MDOT
    • TOURISM DEPT
    • POST

Mayor Bans Guns

12/21/2012

0 Comments

 
Though it may effect the economy and population, the Mayor is drawing a line when it comes to guns in Mooseville that stretches across city limits.

"We don't want them here," the Mayor said. "Should you choose to bring a firearm with you on vacation, you'll have to leave it with Woody Shackles and the Mooseville Police Department for the length of your stay."

When asked about the backlash from Moosevillians who believe in the right to bear arms, the Mayor stood firm on her decision to ban guns.

"You want to bear arms or arm bears, I don't care, but you're going to have do it someplace else," the Mayor said.

Several members of the community have expressed concern about the radical legislation.

"I've got two shotguns I use for hunting," said Eli Survivor. "They also make me feel a bit safer having them in the house. I need to protect my family."

The Mayor assures residents that the measures, though seemingly extreme, have been taken to ensure public safety.

"I won't overlook public safety as a whole for the few who think they need shotguns to hunt in Mooseville Park," the Mayor explained.

As far as protection goes the Mayor says banning firearms won't eliminate crime, but it will help detour senseless acts of violence.

"Violence can still happen in Mooseville," the Mayor said. "Any idiot can pull a trigger, but if you want to kill someone in Mooseville, you've got to do it old school with a knife, or a shank, a bow and arrow, blunt object, or your bare hands. I'm giving our residents a fighting chance with this legislation."

Residents who own firearms are asked to stop by the Mooseville Police Department to check in their weapons.

Those who refuse to relinquish their firearms will be asked to leave city limits.

"I've crunched the numbers, and I'm prepared to take a hit on our economy," the Mayor said. "But I can't sleep at night knowing that a standard Glock holds 17 rounds of ammunition in one magazine. It would only take seven Glocks, with three rounds to spare, to wipe out Mooseville's entire population, and those are numbers I'm not willing to gamble on."
0 Comments

Your comment will be posted after it is approved.


Leave a Reply.

    Picture

    Mission Statement:

    The Mooseville Journal Record is dedicated to providing relevant information to its citizens in a fair, honest, and entertaining manner.


    Picture

    Sections

    All
    Arts & Entertainment
    Business
    Crime
    Editorial Statements
    International News
    Local News
    Politics


    Picture

    Back to News

Moose Tyler Works
Moose Tyler Writes
Back to the Mothership